Wordless Wednesday – Thanksgiving Edition

13 going on ??

So I was just looking outside while on the phone with my sister.

#4, who is a) in 8th grade and b) currently grounded, had some friends over.  (I know – it doesn’t sound like punishment if he is allowed to have friends over, but trust me on this one.)  You know how sometimes things don’t seem funny until you’re describing them to someone else?  Here was the scene…

There were three very awkward 8th grade boys and two very cute 8th grade girls playing a game on the trampoline.  The game appeared to involve the following:

• the boys and girls shove each other down (or tackle, in a couple instances)
• the boys and girls help each other up
• the boys and girls shove each other down and kick each other.

My best guess is that a year from now the girls won’t want to play this game with the boys anymore.

Makeup by RoseArt

Today I did something I had never thought of before.  And I swear I’m not making this up.

I was so on top of things this morning.  I got out the door with the kids an hour early to go vote.  Since I was going to be working all morning at the book fair, the girls and I decided Starbucks would be a fun before-school treat.  We settled in with our hot chocolate, free coffee, and Math homework.

Just as we were getting our things together, I had the sudden realization that I had never finished putting makeup on this morning!  The girls were happy to verify this for me, which made me a little self-conscious.  Alas, my eyebrows and eyelashes are invisible without makeup.

Well (stick with me – this is where the pace picks up), on the way to school in the car, I managed to find a Sharpie in my purse, which I used as mascara.  And #5 dug a brown colored pencil out of her back pack, which served as a scratchy eyebrow pencil.  It wasn’t exactly a professional makeup job, but can you believe my resourcefulness?  I am a cosmetic MacGyver!

Halloween fun (and attitude)

Zombie Princess (cuz you gotta be a princess or a fairy or a ballerina)

Pippi Longstocking (how easy can you get?)

#3, the 1970s high school soccer player with facial hair, and his best friend, The Joker

#5 (on the left) said, “Do I look like Helen?”

We’re done for another year.

Your kids will bust you

I got to sit in on my husband’s Confirmation class this evening.  This is a bunch of 8th graders (mostly boys) in various stages of development.  They talk about politics,  throw food, pass gas, and ask great questions.  It’s amazing.  And I am thankful that I don’t have to teach them.

Tonight they were talking about temptations that kids their age are faced with. They giggled through topics like “looking at pornography” and “having sex.”  When “swearing” came up, some of them admitted to having trouble with it because everyone they know swears.  One boy had the line of the evening (and the one that reminded me that our kids are always watching us): “You wanna hear swearing?  You should hear my dad at my football games!”  Yikes.

The lights may be on…

Here’s an exchange I had yesterday afternoon with my youngest…

#6: Now can I call Claire to come play?

Me: Well, did you finish putting your laundry away like I asked?  (at least 14 times, I might add)

#6: Oh, I forgot.

Me: Well, what were you doing up there?

#6: Looking.

Me: At what?

#6: I don’t know.  Just walking around looking.

Wordless Wednesday

Stinky Little Girls

#5 and her friend Helen are having a farting contest.  It all started about 5 minutes ago when Helen tripped and accidently let one rip – with authority.  There was a brief moment of embarassed silence followed by giggles, raucous laughter and then an outright competition.  Modesty be gone.

The only thing missing was a lighter.

Sick Days

#3 walked in the door 3 minutes ago and already is down to his boxers, drinking a can of Pepsi – which apparently makes his stomach feel better.  (I did not know that about Pepsi.)  He started the day okay (I think – I mostly parented from my bed this morning) but called at 9:11complaining of a stomach ache.

I told him to eat the Nurse’s Office saltines (hey, that should be a brand name: Nurse’s Office Saltines.  Or what about Sunday School Animal Crackers?  Or Park District Soccer Game Juice Boxes?) and lie down until he felt better.  I even encouraged him to push through till lunch, when he could get him some of that High School Cafeteria Pizza.   However, it just wasn’t to be.  He called 6 minutes later and said that he wasn’t feeling any better and could he just come home.  Yeah, 6 whole minutes and he wasn’t feeling any better!

So, it is now 9:45, and he’s already finished his Pepsi and is on to last night’s leftovers and some pretzels.  Poor kid.  He hasn’t decided yet whether he’ll be upstairs or downstairs.  I’m hoping for upstairs so that I can pretend he’s not here.  I mean, I like him and all, but it’s a school day, and that’s supposed to mean that I get to be kidless for a few hours.  Which leads me to yesterday…

Okay, granted it was Monday and cold and rainy, but wouldn’t you know that #5 wasn’t feeling well when she woke up? And being the lazy-butt mother that I am, I even planted the seed in #6’s mind that maybe she wasn’t feeling too well, either.  That way, I could get out of making lunches or driving anyone to school.  It worked; the cold she was starting over the weekend turned into a full blown (and I mean at-death’s-door) case of sniffles and a headache.

My kids rarely have fevers or any truly measurable ailments.  They have headaches and stomach aches and have even learned that sore throats are hard for me to verify.  So, if you mix it up a bit and have, say, a headache and a stomach ache one week and then just a sore throat the next, Mom will let you stay home.  But don’t combine too many ailments too often or Mom will a) not believe you or b) make you go get a gaggy strep test from Nurse Jana.  Also, if you get picky about which medicine you want to take, Mom’s gonna get suspicious.

So here’s how the girls’ day went yesterday:

• Acted sick enough to stay home until the coast was clear.
• Asked for saltines and Sprite (sorry, no Sprite – and I wasn’t offering Pepsi because I did not yet know of its miraculous healing powers)
• Got all comfy in Mom & Dad’s bed with books
• Continued to be comfy in Mom & Dad’s bed with t.v. and coloring
• Felt well enough to eat half a loaf of chocolate chip pumpkin bread
• “Slept” because Mom was starting to mention going back to school after lunch
• #5 cleaned her room (she likes order) while #6 got out scissors and created lots of tiny paper scraps (she doesn’t care so much for order)
• Played Webkinz school
• Bickered
• “Slept”
• Watched a heck of a lot of Disney Channel

Me?  I stayed in my jammies most of the day (well, they did request that I put on a bra at one point) and did housework.  I never made it to the gym or the grocery store, but it wasn’t a bad day.

There will be no sick kids tomorrow.  It is my coffee day.  The kids know that by now.

Wordless Wednesday